Major Life Transition: Tips from a Personal Life Coach for Women

Are you a woman for whom life is changing or has changed in ways you weren’t expecting? Or are there situations you aren’t sure how to handle, and you are trying to find your way?  Maybe you are facing starting over after divorce.  Or maybe you are grieving the loss of a loved one.  Or maybe you have changed careers or moved across the country.  Whatever it is – it’s a major life transition and you want answers on how to get through.  You know that your own personal growth and spiritual growth are critical to making the most out of your life now. This article offers some tips from a personal life coach for women to help you move through and beyond divorce or other life transition to a life you love – your authentic life.

As a mindfulness coach, I help many women in transition find their way through and beyond difficult life transition.  The focus of our personal life coach work together is meaningful personal and spiritual growth including learning mindfulness practices for more mindful living in order to lead a more authentic and joyful life.

Here are the best recommendations from my work as a life coach for women that you may find very helpful when you are in a life transition.

1) Take time for yourself.  It is time to ramp up the self care during your life transition!  Women are notorious for ignoring their own needs.  The best way to support yourself as a woman in a life transition is to practice excellent self care.  This means caring for all aspects of your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual self.   Give yourself adequate rest, relaxation, good food, proper exercise, meditation, and plenty of support from friends and/or a professional such as a life coach for women.

2) Slow down.  Even though life may be coming at you quickly, and demanding decisions, you will find that by slowing down just a bit, allowing yourself to be more mindful and present, taking time for a few deep breaths , living in the moment – you will make better decisions.  There is no reason to rush into critical decisions that will impact the rest of your life, such as where best to live or work.  Take your time and be gentle with your adjustment process that is natural to life transition.

3) Self acceptance and self love.  Women tend to be hard on themselves and expect themselves to know just what to do and how to fix any situation – perfectly.  This just sets you up for feeling shame or fear about your process of finding your way.  When things fall apart, it takes time to find your way again.  It may look messy for a while as you try out a few ideas or walk around in the fog during a life transition.  You can save yourself a lot of misery by understanding that you are exactly where you need to be, taking the actions you need to take in order to transition to the next part of your journey.  Let it be messy, because it will be whether you let it or not.  Allow yourself to make mistakes by trying things out slowly.  Don’t put everything at risk with each decision, such as moving cross country without living there for a while to see if it’s right for you.  Try things out and don’t worry when it doesn’t work out as you hoped.  This is how we learn!  And you are in a major learning phase of life.  As a life coach for women in transition, I have seen that the growth into self acceptance is the most powerful process for starting over after divorce or loss, to create an authentic life you love.

4) Stay open to possibilities.  To live in the state of possibility means being open to the concept that everything is working out for your good.  It also means you are willing to expect to receive the many good things which are coming your way.  Life is flowing and will carry you along.  You can relax and let go and trust.  You can practice mindfulness, mindful living, and true self acceptance as often as possible.

The good news in life transition, as difficult as it may seem, is that we are designed to change.  We are designed to feel challenged and lost and find our way again. We are resourceful and creative and Life is on our side.

Emotional IQ Mindfulness Practice from a Life Coach for Women

When I came across the quote below from Victor Frankl this morning, I decided to take it into meditation so that I might absorb it more fully.  When I read this quote, it seemed to resonate with a chord deep inside me.  In this article, I share from my meditation, mindfulness practice, and experience as a life coach for women about a mindfulness practice for developing our emotional IQ and becoming a giver of light.

“To give light one must endure burning.”
—- Victor Emil Frankl

For me, I feel that giving light and love is my highest calling.  As a Life Coach for Women I am always striving to be a giver of light and support my clients in developing their own awareness of being givers of light.  When I am in a pure space of Presence and allowing the Light to shine through me, it is that sense of Oneness that feels right and clear and open.  It is what I believe is our True Nature.  And we are meant to share the beauty of our true nature.

What we find is that there are all degrees of being able to experience the light and Presence.   There may be a bit of fogginess or confusion that makes it a the light seem less bright and also harder to share with others.  Then there are times when I can’t sense the light at all.  When there are hurts or fears or doubts, the light seems dim or hard to experience.  By working with these emotions, I have come to know that when fearful, I have somehow allowed thoughts and emotions to cover up my access to the light.  I can be both aware of this, and also unable to find my way back to the Light easily.

A mindfulness practice called Awareness of Emotions that I recommend in my work as a life coach for women and practice daily myself, is very helpful in returning to the Presence so that I may be a giver of light.  It is the process of going deeply into completely experiencing the physical components of an emotion.  When we focus attention on the physical sensations in the body of fear or sadness, and remove the focus from thinking and thoughts, an opening occurs, a softening in the heart.

Our egos don’t want to believe this, but mindful sitting with the discomfort in the body, the tension, the tightness, the restlessness, with attention and compassion for our authentic experience is a doorway into the Light. By lovingly bringing awareness to the upset (without the stories), soon we find the warmth that is the Light has always been there within.

This is not an easy mindfulness practice.  It can be extremely intense to feel fear or emotional pain in the body. And I believe that Victor Frankl gave a good description of this practice, saying we  “must endure burning”.  That is why Frankl’s quote struck a chord within me.  In order to be a giver of light, I know I must endure the burning of facing and loving my own pain to be able to be a giver of light.

Creating a Life Vision: Tips from a Life Coach

It’s important and valuable to have a life direction.  However, there seems to be a lot of confusion about how to create or connect with your personal inspired vision for your life.  In this article, I hope to provide some insight in just what a life vision comprises, and the qualities of a life vision that will inspire and motivate you and others around you.

There’s some confusion around the concepts we call vision, purpose and mission statements.  What I’ve come to realize is that a life vision is much more expansive and powerful than either purpose or mission.  Purpose and mission are necessarily more narrow and tend to include aspects of measurement and comparison or judgment.  Whereas, vision does not.  Vision does provide direction, but it open and takes you beyond the land of measurements.

A vision is actually a “view” or image of what truly inspires you.  It’s a big picture of the greater possibilities for your life.  When you create your life vision (or rather get in touch with it, because spiritually, it is already there waiting for you to access it) it becomes the inspiration for your every action and focus.  It is the view that will help you create powerful goals and action plans.

A life vision is unlimited because it isn’t a finite landing place.  It’s more of a powerful launching pad.  It will contain possibilities for expansion and growth and development as it fosters new ideas and openings.  And most importantly, a powerful life vision will inspire you and others to take action.

Furthermore, a Life Vision is a powerful picture or image that when held in mind it actually transforms the state of mind of the viewer.  It has the power to expand the mind into the realm of great possibility and inspiration.  It energizes and uplifts your state of being into the higher realm of possibility, joy and creativity.  It also takes you out of the realm of right and wrong and judgment and comparisons.  It brings everyone into a space of present moment creativity.  It isn’t a “future” reality.  It can be seen and felt here and now.

Here are three steps to help you begin to access your life vision.  You can use these for any aspect of your life – health, relationships, career, spirituality, etc.

1) First, enter into a meditation that brings you out of the realm of your day-to-day concerns and into the space of presence and peace.  This is the space where we can here the voice of our higher selves.

2) Let yourself begin to imagine the highest possibility for your life, letting your creativity expand into pictures that you can actually see, taste and feel as they come alive in your imagination

3) Write down what you see – describe the picture.  Describe the view of “how it is” in the realm of possibility.

To help you with this, here is a portion of my life vision.

I see that through my work, women are powerfully supported for personal and spiritual growth and transformation, so that they may face life’s challenges with courage and wisdom and create their lives with meaning, vision and joy through mindful living.  I see the positive spiritual growth of women living more mindfully and joyfully as a ripple effect, spreading out to bless others – children, spouses, friends, parents, co-workers, communities, the world.

Enjoy creating your new life vision!